Raging Fuel
The jumbles man, the jumbles
<center><a href="http://www.emulation64.com/reviews/images/n64/Yoshi1_WEB.jpg"><img src="http://www.emulation64.com/reviews/images/n64/Yoshi1_WEBs.jpg" border="0"></a></center>
Warning: Previous to writing this review I was subject to ridiculous amounts of Yoshi's Story. Read at your own risk.
Yoshi’s Story is one of the only 2D platformers on the N64, and if this is as good as they get, then it’s not surprising that there aren’t anymore around. The first time I played Yoshi’s Story was over a year ago, in a shopping centre, and although I only played it for a few minutes I hated it. It wasn’t the graphics, they were nice and colourful, it wasn't the sound, it was cheery and catchy: it was the controls. In a word, they sucked. Moving about was so hard to do. It was like being on an ice level throughout the whole game. Back then I thought maybe it was just the bad controller there, but now after playing it at home, I realised that this game was crap.
So why did I bother even playing this terrible game in the first place? Well it was Yoshi’s Island on the SNES. I recently had the great opportunity to play Yoshi's Island, and was impressed by the whole game. The levels were well designed, the game was challenging, but not impossible, and it was just plain fun. But this review is about Yoshi's Island, so I'll get back to that.
The story is as follows: Baby Bowser has stolen the 'Super Happy Tree' from Yoshi Island. Now the entire baby Yoshi's have been and Yoshi Island have been transformed into a storybook and must travel through the book to face Baby Bowser at the end. Each page of the book has four levels.
Playing the game is just a matter of jumping over enemies, collecting eggs, and then throwing those eggs. There is no challenge in Yoshi's Story; each level can usually be completed the first time. Finishing the game is actually quite hard, because you will most likely get bored after getting half way through the game (bout 20 minutes). I have been writing this for about 20 minutes now actually, and I feel if I think about Yoshi's Story anyway I'm going to have a nervous breakdown, so to finish this review I'm going to introduce my dog, Honey.
<center><a href="http://www.emulation64.com/reviews/images/n64/Yoshi3_WEB.jpg"><img src="http://www.emulation64.com/reviews/images/n64/Yoshi3_WEBs.jpg" border="0"></a></center>
Honey says: Wow, thanks Pat. I've always wanted to write a review, but why does it have to be for a crap game like Yoshi's Story? Oh well, gotta start somewhere.
Firstly, I've Yoshi's Story is one of the few games I've never played. I fell asleep while Pat was playing, but as this is my big break into journalism, I better start with what I know. Let me tell you a short story. About a week ago, our house was being painted. I sat watching the paint for about three hours. Let me tell you that watching paint dry is more fun than Yoshi's Story. Ever wondered why dogs sniff their arse? Coz it’s the alternative to playing Yoshi's Story. Want to know why dogs rub themselves in s***. So anyway that wants us to play Yoshi's Story will f*** off. I hate this game and anyone that plays it. Soon I will rule the world and will kill everyone on it!!! You have been warned, bow down to all-powerful Honey or face my wrath! You’re all doomed! DOOOOOMMMMEEEDDD!!!
Pat says: Ok. I’m sorry you all had to hear that. Honey has a little problem and she promised not to talk about ruling the world in this review. I can tell you Honey won’t be coming back to do a guest review anytime soon (unless she does become ruler of the world, in that case she can do one anytime).
To sum up, this game should not be played by anyone. Ever. Even thinking about playing it had cause brain damage. But don’t think that because this game is bad, that Super Mario 2: Yoshi’s Island is just like it. Yoshi’s Island is a fantastic game and is essential gaming, so go get yourself a SNES and start playing. As for Yoshi’s Story, well the score speaks for itself.
<center><a href="http://www.emulation64.com/reviews/images/n64/Yoshi4_WEB.jpg"><img src="http://www.emulation64.com/reviews/images/n64/Yoshi4_WEBs.jpg" border="0"></a></center>
Sound: 8
Graphics: 8
Gameplay: 2
Join me for the next crap game I review for a new guest reviewer, my other dog, Chloe. Hopefully things go better with her.
(Originally posted November 25, 2001)
Warning: Previous to writing this review I was subject to ridiculous amounts of Yoshi's Story. Read at your own risk.
Yoshi’s Story is one of the only 2D platformers on the N64, and if this is as good as they get, then it’s not surprising that there aren’t anymore around. The first time I played Yoshi’s Story was over a year ago, in a shopping centre, and although I only played it for a few minutes I hated it. It wasn’t the graphics, they were nice and colourful, it wasn't the sound, it was cheery and catchy: it was the controls. In a word, they sucked. Moving about was so hard to do. It was like being on an ice level throughout the whole game. Back then I thought maybe it was just the bad controller there, but now after playing it at home, I realised that this game was crap.
So why did I bother even playing this terrible game in the first place? Well it was Yoshi’s Island on the SNES. I recently had the great opportunity to play Yoshi's Island, and was impressed by the whole game. The levels were well designed, the game was challenging, but not impossible, and it was just plain fun. But this review is about Yoshi's Island, so I'll get back to that.
The story is as follows: Baby Bowser has stolen the 'Super Happy Tree' from Yoshi Island. Now the entire baby Yoshi's have been and Yoshi Island have been transformed into a storybook and must travel through the book to face Baby Bowser at the end. Each page of the book has four levels.
Playing the game is just a matter of jumping over enemies, collecting eggs, and then throwing those eggs. There is no challenge in Yoshi's Story; each level can usually be completed the first time. Finishing the game is actually quite hard, because you will most likely get bored after getting half way through the game (bout 20 minutes). I have been writing this for about 20 minutes now actually, and I feel if I think about Yoshi's Story anyway I'm going to have a nervous breakdown, so to finish this review I'm going to introduce my dog, Honey.
<center><a href="http://www.emulation64.com/reviews/images/n64/Yoshi3_WEB.jpg"><img src="http://www.emulation64.com/reviews/images/n64/Yoshi3_WEBs.jpg" border="0"></a></center>
Honey says: Wow, thanks Pat. I've always wanted to write a review, but why does it have to be for a crap game like Yoshi's Story? Oh well, gotta start somewhere.
Firstly, I've Yoshi's Story is one of the few games I've never played. I fell asleep while Pat was playing, but as this is my big break into journalism, I better start with what I know. Let me tell you a short story. About a week ago, our house was being painted. I sat watching the paint for about three hours. Let me tell you that watching paint dry is more fun than Yoshi's Story. Ever wondered why dogs sniff their arse? Coz it’s the alternative to playing Yoshi's Story. Want to know why dogs rub themselves in s***. So anyway that wants us to play Yoshi's Story will f*** off. I hate this game and anyone that plays it. Soon I will rule the world and will kill everyone on it!!! You have been warned, bow down to all-powerful Honey or face my wrath! You’re all doomed! DOOOOOMMMMEEEDDD!!!
Pat says: Ok. I’m sorry you all had to hear that. Honey has a little problem and she promised not to talk about ruling the world in this review. I can tell you Honey won’t be coming back to do a guest review anytime soon (unless she does become ruler of the world, in that case she can do one anytime).
To sum up, this game should not be played by anyone. Ever. Even thinking about playing it had cause brain damage. But don’t think that because this game is bad, that Super Mario 2: Yoshi’s Island is just like it. Yoshi’s Island is a fantastic game and is essential gaming, so go get yourself a SNES and start playing. As for Yoshi’s Story, well the score speaks for itself.
<center><a href="http://www.emulation64.com/reviews/images/n64/Yoshi4_WEB.jpg"><img src="http://www.emulation64.com/reviews/images/n64/Yoshi4_WEBs.jpg" border="0"></a></center>
Sound: 8
Graphics: 8
Gameplay: 2
Join me for the next crap game I review for a new guest reviewer, my other dog, Chloe. Hopefully things go better with her.
(Originally posted November 25, 2001)
